April 2nd, 2009

Best Chain Email of the Week

by Gordon Smith

And The Winner Is . Man's Worst Friends

True Friendship “Aussie Style”. None of that Sissy Crap.

Are you tired of those piss weak ‘friendship’ poems that always sound good, but never actually come close to reality?

Well, here is a series of promises that actually speak of true friendship.

You will see no cute little smiley faces on this card. Just the stone cold truth of a great friendship.

1. When you are sad… I will help you get hammered and plot revenge against the bxxstard who made you sad.

2. When you are blue… I will try to dislodge whatever is choking you.

3. When you smile… I will know you are thinking of something that I would probably want to be involved in.

4. When you are scared… I will tease you about it every chance I get until you’re not.

5. When you are worried… I will tell you stories about how much worse it could be until you stop wining.

6. When you are confused… I will try to use only little words.

7. When you are sick… Stay the hell away from me until you are well again. I don’t want whatever you have.

8. When you fall… I will laugh at your clumsy arse, but I’ll help you up.

9. This is my oath…. I pledge it to the end. ‘Why?’ you may ask – because you are my friend.

Friendship is like pissing your pants, everyone can see it, but only you can feel the true warmth.

Send this to 10 of your closest friends, then get depressed because you can only think of 4

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Imagine that, no one has commented yet. Effin' whimps.

Go 'head fool, talk your sorry ass smack.